Hey friends..

So what in the heck am I doing right now??

To be practical in my answer, I have been writing songs like crazy– traveling to Nashville to write songs, and eagerly planning all the details for the upcoming days and the summer schedule, along with planning my next new album (Lord willing the plans that are being made continue). It’s been very exciting, challenging, and interesting….absolutely!

On a deeper level, however….I have been praying my guts out. Seeking wisdom like I never have before, and been on my knees every waking minute. Well..it feels like it anyway.

I am in the heat of transition for my future in musical endeavors…and it has tended to feel pretty heavy on my shoulders lately, because of my desperation to listen and obey the voice of my Father who is so patiently using me still and working within my stubbornness even so. I have been slamming my face against the wall because of the hypocrisy I see in my life– How every minute I desire with such passion to do what God wants…but then within that very same moment I hear his voice and turn from it and listen to my own stubbornness to do what I feel like. And at the same time, I am steadily learning about God’s GRACE…and it’s shredding me up. In a good way. In the most beautiful way, actually. I don’t know how to describe it though… I’m just at this point where I am dead speechless to how God of the universe sees ME. ME…the one who is a jerk to people that aren’t quick enough to answer my question. ME–the one who so easily tries to run away from Him on a daily basis. ME–the one who has no patience, but quick to judge. I am these things, all of them are within me. (If I tried to tell you they weren’t, or you tried to believe they were not..then I would be living a lie, speaking a lie.) However…Jesus. That’s it. JESUS. HIS LOVE! He died in MY place for all MY wretchedness, so that I could freely have life and have it to the full! Because He stood MY place on the cross, now God looks at me and sees me pure and blameless. Without sin. THIS is grace. This is LOVE. I can’t get around it. It’s what He sees when He looks at me now..not my sin, or the fact that I am destined to hell because of my natural state of being a sinner.(SIN leads to DEATH..we were naturally born sinners..**ex: onion seed grows to become an onion naturally..so does a sinner lead to death/hell) He died to change that destiny of death for me. WOWWW!! What a GIFT! GRACE!!

Right now, all I know..is that Jesus’ LOVE is the only thing that changes my life. It changed my life, and is still changing it. He loved me enough to DIE on the cross, for MY sin. In MY place. It aint no lovey dovey “take me to the movies” love..he DIED. THIS love, is the love I want to have for you. THIS LOVE, is the love we are called to. Loving others like Jesus did–for the good of their life.

As I am preparing for this next phase in my ministry, please pray for my family and I. I have already been facing some challenges that show me very evidently that we live in a world that tries to please itself, and does not seek to be this type of love at all. It’s like it has never even been mentioned. The road God is calling me to is one that is narrow, and it keeps getting even more narrow. The hope I have and am certain of though, is more beautiful than anything in the world, so I want to continue on. It does seem to get hard sometimes to distinguish between a rabbit’s trail off the road, and the actual road itself, however..and this is where I need more prayer! I have this feeling that not many feet have walked this road.. It is not paved, and is hard to see sometimes. But my hope is in the One that I know is at the end of the road, the One that keeps taking me by the shoulders and turning me around to show me that ONLY by His guidance and faithfulness to NEVER leave me, have I stayed on the right road.
I CAN HARDLY WAIT TO SHARE NEW MUSIC WITH YOU ALL!!!! =)

Grace and peace to you, my friends and family.

In Christ,

Holly =)

“The deeper you go, the more compressed you feel..be patient.”